you will not see that headline. However, bear with me as this resembles but is not the fairytale.
Begging weapons from the rebels, Hambo, Bacon & Pork came up with
a plan. By the dark of the moon, they would whack the sentry, Stan
Morg, a known thief, who guarded the Zodiac and cross the Straits of
Hell. Once there, PORK would become Mz Pork Chop or the Pig who wore
lipstick, and entice the lone sentry from Tower of Hades Command Center,
out and Hambo would whack him, just like Stan Morg ( turned out he was a
low level troll by the name of Frank - Morg had bolted a week
earlier). It went as planned, and
the sentry, a country boy named Po Bolony, found himself in plastic
cuffs, face down Mz. Pork Chops hoof on his neck, while Bacon and Hambo
C-4'd the door and detonated 2 stun and 2 flashbang grenades, stunning
Satan at the Command Console. Hambo jumped him as he tried to stagger
away, and Bacon tethered him with the plastic cuffs and collar,
rendering him immobile.
A thunderous noise was upon them, as Satan had started the
Self-Destruct Sequence Module, which Hambo had shut off, but not before
the Gates of Hell opened momentarily and sent a 2 sq. mile column of
super-heated air 50,000 feet into Earth's atmosphere, starting a
Super-Cell Hail Storm ( from Hell, literally) that rained 2" hail balls
over all of Hell's half acre, and dropped the temperature to -20 F.
Stunned Hambo & Bacon surveyed the scene outdoors. PO & Mz
Porky were safe under cover but shivering.
The entire landscape as far as you could see, was shining white,
covered in a foot thick crust of hail. Using their US surplus PRC-6
radio sets, the Pigs called the Rebels and this was their message in
" WE have Captured Satan, because
HELL HAS FROZEN OVER -
And from that day on, it was known as THE DAY HELL FROZE OVER.
This is a re-tread from Oct 3, 2013, however as we approach the ANNIVERSARY of TAX MASSACRE DAY, I thought it was worth a repeat.
Further the close the HUI & GDX get to the STRAITS of HELL, the more appropriate this feels and the harder I laugh. For background, I will also re-tread the FOUR GOLDBUG FACTS from HELL for an update.